there's a reason for that
At heart I don't feel good enough. I never have. I just hide it better than most.
There is something I love to do and was basically told that I'm not good enough at it. Not with those words mind you but it's all the same. kwim? Now, I can barely do what I love without thinking of those words of inadequacy.
Why? Why can't I just be happy to do what I love for God and for me and not worry what anyone else thinks? Because unfortunately, the praise of man still speaks to this flesh I am in and it craves it. I want to be good enough, I want to be the one picked, I want someone to think I am the best at something.
Don't be fooled, I know I am not the best at anything I do. There is always someone that can do it better, faster, etc. I want just once for that to be me, though. Ya know?
I'm not quite done with my pity party so I won't bore you any longer. :) The attitude adjustment will come tonight and tomorrow I will post pretty pictures and happy thoughts. lol
5 comments:
Hey there friend,
Know that you are loved and that you are fantastic!! Please feel this long distance hug from me. :)
I hear you, oh boy, do I hear you. Most days I feel like I am ok at a lot of things and good at nothing. But we press on right?
I know exactly how you feel Renita! You are the BEST momma to your 4 girls! God gave them to YOU and not someone else. You are the BEST wife for Steven! God gave him to YOU and not someone else. I'm sure there are a ton more things! Make a list!
Praying for ya!
Kerri
I know what you mean, Renita. It's very difficult to experience rejection. I was reminded of that on our recent trip and have been second-guessing myself every since. Hang in there, friend. I love ya!
Right on, Laura! Renita, we love you just the way you are!
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