Have you ever had one of those days where you knew from the beginning that it wasn't going to be good? That was my day today. I had decided that we would take a lazy approach to our day and just start the day snuggling my 4 girls in my bed. It was wonderful-for about 5 seconds! Then came the 'Ouch, you did that on purpose', or how about 'That's MY spot, Mom make her move from my spot'. Wait a minute-I thought this was MY bed. Next it moved into the 'Don't touch me' category. And before I could blink it sailed right through the glaring looks into the 'If you touch me again, I am going to hit you' phase. So in less than 5 minutes I went from this warm snuggly idea of all my girls curled up with me on a cool fall morning to being kneed in the groin and stomach, and taking an elbow in the 'fleshy' part of the chest. My hair was being ripped from my scalp as the 2yodd tried to crawl away from her big sister who was scaring her and laughed hysterically at my pain. The 5yodd seemed to think that I was a body pillow and would not remove herself from on top of me. As I was under the blankets and she was on top of them-I was essentially a Mom Burrito with no way to defend myself. The 8yodd found the humor in that but not in the fact that her 5yo sister had just breathed on her. Speaking of breathing, I am getting hot under the 50lbs of squirming girl. Ouch, another knee to the groin. Peels of laughter-none of them mine. The 2yodd leans over my face and asks if I am okay and as she does, some spit falls out of her mouth onto my face. Remember, I am the Mom Burrito and have no way to defend myself from this onslaught of bodily fluids. At least it fell on my cheek! More eye rolling and moving away from the offending 'breather'. The 2yo pushes the 9yodd off the bed and the 9yo is so positive that she did it on purpose that the 2yo is crying and saying, 'I'm sorry sissy, I didn't do it on accident'. Then the 5yo actually touched the 8yo. Can you imagine such a thing? Four kids and a mom in a full size bed and someone actually got touched by someone else? Call the newspaper or something! The 8yo heaved a sigh and got out of bed, the 9yo followed saying something about the 2yo not letting her back in 'her' spot, the 2yo followed the 9yo asking to be tickled, and the 5yo is still on the Mom Burrito. She has decided that it is a warm and toasty spot and wants to stay. By this time I am getting claustrophobic and I am sweating, so I push her aside and uncover gasping for air. I did not realize the force I had used and she ended up on the floor!! It took a full 5 minutes to convince her that I did not do it on purpose. Now that that is over, let's go make breakfast and do school, and oh yeah-get the house ready for couples Bible Study! WOOHOO!
I won't even go into how the rest of the morning went. Let's just leave it at I lost my cool and everyone else lost all movie privileges for the entire weekend. I didn't think that one through since the t.v. and dvd player are downstairs with two bedrooms. It is kind of hard to think rationally when you have a 2yo, a 5yo, an 8yo, and a 9yo screaming and crying at the top of their lungs how they didn't do it and why do we have to clean, isn't that your job anyway? That was so not the right thing to say! They should be thankful that my mind was so frozen with a red hot fire that I couldn't think of anything else to do to them at that moment. It was not one of my better parenting days. Not by a long shot!
We'll see how tomorrow goes. If it doesn't go well, they can always go to Grandma's!! I want to see them try this stuff with Grandma just one time. LOL I can see it now, that head whipping around and the finger coming out to a point, the other hand on the hip. Next comes the stare. The look that slices right through you and looks at you from behind! ROFLOL I would almost pay money to see the looks on my kids faces if they tried that with her!!! A girl can dream, can't she?